Since opening my practice in September 2013, I have met with many people who are unhappy with the terms of the divorce that they negotiated themselves or because they feel they used the wrong attorney to represent them for their divorce.  Many of these clients have very convincing emotional arguments as to why it is unfair for them to have to abide by the terms of the divorce decree.  Unfortunately, the Court, in most cases, could care less whether these clients feel their divorce decree is fair, or whether they are upset about the terms of the divorce or the way in which it was decided.

A divorce decree can only be modified if a substantial change in circumstances occurs after the divorce decree is entered and if the change was not contemplated by the divorce decree.  While there are a few exceptions to this rule, in most cases a person must wait for that change in circumstances even if they are unhappy with the terms of their divorce decree.  However, even when there has been a substantial change in circumstances, often the modification is limited to a few of the terms of the decree, and the person seeking the modification will have much less negotiating power because of the limited scope of the modification proceeding.  Not to mention, modifying a decree can cost as much as the original divorce.

So here are a few tips for ensuring you are happy with your decree of divorce into the future:

• Never Negotiate Your Own Decree
• Research multiple attorneys before hiring one
• Keep your attorney informed as to your goals, needs, and expectations.
• Perform a personal financial review and figure out exactly what you need to live (including any possible future expenses) before settling your divorce.
• If necessary, or helpful, get counseling for emotional and mental issues early in your divorce to avoid adverse effects.

 If you have children, your divorce decree will govern your relationship with your ex and your children until all of your children have turned 18.  The best way to ensure your decree of divorce serves your needs and protects your interests into the future is to hire an attorney who will help you reach your goals in the divorce and who understands the terms that need to be in place to protect you in the future.

 

Divorce: There Will Be Collateral Damage

I am a strong advocate for family.  I am also a divorce attorney.  If viewed as two isolated viewpoints, you may believe I live a very conflicted life.  In reality, the two belief systems are very much connected.  Divorce plays an important role in our community by offering people a way out of abusive, and often dangerous, situations.  It also provides a vehicle to end marriages which have simply failed because of the failures of the parties.  This in turn allows the parties to move forward in a more healthy way.

As you can imagine, there are certain side effects that people expect to result from their divorce, ie a smaller income, a division of property, less visitation with their children, or a child support obligation.  However, the collateral damage which results from a divorce is often much deeper and personal than people imagine at the outset.

In almost every divorce there will be emotional and psychological effects which will be experienced at some point, and often are carried for months or years even after the divorce has been finalized.  Many people believe these psychological and emotional effects stem from the high conflict nature of a contested divorce.  But I see the effects even in my most amicable divorces.

There comes a point during the divorce when reality actually sets in.  When people realize that their lives are now different.  When they realize that not having full access to their children 24 hours a day 7 days a week hurts more than they imagined.  When they realize that their spouse, despite all of his/her aggravating habits will still be very involved in their children’s lives.

Now, I do not believe everyone who gets divorced should not get divorced just to avoid feeling the unexpected hurt, guilt, or emptiness that will inevitably come.  In many cases, the hurt they feel during their marriage is much worse.

What I am suggesting is that everyone involved in a divorce should seek treatment from a qualified therapist to help them cope with the adjustment from married life.  The transition is not easy, but it can be made bearable with the support of a qualified divorce adjustment therapist.

I maintain relationships with many qualified divorce adjustment therapists that are willing and able to help my clients, which helps my clients make informed and rational decisions during their divorce and helps them cope with the inevitable collateral damage they suffer during and after the divorce is final.

Social Security Disability Advocate

As a Social Security Disability Advocate, I help people suffering from a disability apply for and receive disability benefits through Social Security.  When a person suffers from a disability, their first concern is taking care of their own health and personal needs.  If the person recently became disabled, then they are also dealing with the stress and anxiety that comes with relearning how to do tasks that may have at one time been easy for them to complete.

People suffering from disabilities should not be required to fill out the complex Social Security Disability application, gather all of their medical records, and interact with the Social Security Disability office without assistance.  That is where I can help.

I can help people with their initial Social Security Disability application, help them apply for reconsideration if they have been denied, and I can represent them at an appeals hearing if necessary.  I will also assist them in gathering all of the medical records and doctor affidavits.  Once I am representing someone with a disability, the Social Security Office will send their correspondence through me, so that I can explain it to my clients.

In many cases, I can help people apply for disability benefits without them having to pay any money out of their pocket.  Then, Social Security ultimately decides what I am entitled to receive in payment, usually only if we are successful in getting benefits.  This means that people who are already suffering financially because of mounting medical bills or because they are no longer able to work can receive services without having to worry about coming up with a retainer up front.

Lastly, I am willing to represent people from Logan to Saint George.  I am even willing to work with people in surrounding states as well.

As always, I will continue to provide legal services in the areas of Divorce, Custody, Wills and Trusts, Car Accidents, and Worker’s Compensation.  In fact, I have had a successful month mediating and litigating divorce matters.  However, in addition to these services, I would love to help your friends or loved ones who may be suffering from a disability.